The Philosopher is a 20 page chapbook and fable by Gregory K. H. Bryant and published by the zine Musea. It tells the story of a mule, tired of reaching for a carrot, turns to philosophy. 23 copies were printed on June 20, 1996. On the cover the mule is carrying a sandwich board that reads, "Expert Advice! All Your Philosophical Problems Solved!! All Questions Answered None Too Large None Too Small Hairs split at No Extra Charge!"